Sunday, August 28, 2016

Newsday TV Book, August 27-September 2, 1972.

Sandy Duncan makes funny faces on this week's Newsday TV Book cover. Well, she made one funny face, then smiled, and then sat on an ice cube.
In the story, we learn that Sandy did not have her left eye removed due to her brain tumor, she just lost the vision in it. I always thought she had a glass eye. I also thought she was the spokeswoman for Triscuits, but checking out her Wikipedia page I learned it was actually Wheat Thins. Sandy, I hardly know ye. (But ye should know that you can click on the pictures to blow them up.)
Lots of interesting trivia in the TV Line: Is Kreskin authentic? Is Paul Sand a bit-part player? Who was that pipe-smoking homosexual? There's a Puerto Rican Bar Association? And just who is Tom Narz?
Earl Ubell plays with a balloon and is declared a genius. I play with a balloon and everyone looks at me funny until the bus driver asks me to leave. It's bullshit.
Carol Lynley donned her Billie Jean King glasses for Sunday's episode of The Bold Ones. Think how much time and ink Newsday could have saved by not bothering to tell us the character names in these descriptions. Did anyone ever say, "John Saxon is in this one... and look! He's playing Dr. Ted Stuart!"
Here are the daily Olympic schedules for the week. The Israeli team massacre would not occur until the morning of the 5th. Mark Spitz was the star of the week with seven gold medals. In the wake of the mass murder, however, the Jewish Spitz was asked to leave before the closing ceremony for his own safety.
Here's the rest of the events, plus a Barbizon ad in case you need help with wardrobe planning and personal grace. (If you have a wet basement, I'd suggest you address that problem first.)
The wet basement ad has the tagline, "Don't mop it, stop it!" That would also make a good slogan for this Enurtone dry bed training pitch. (I may have uploaded this pic before, but once more sure won't hurt.)
If watching ten short plays about pollution doesn't sound like a fun Friday evening at home, check out all the other swell movies and programs you can tune in instead, mostly after the evening news. I like reviewer John Cashman's caveat about how one's prejudice towards Danny Kaye would affect enjoyment of the 9 o'clock movie on WCBS. (And I like Dick Caveat too, haw haw!)
In lieu of a back cover, here's a little Holiday Spa cheesecake! Oocha-magoocha, I'm seein' spots!
Next week is the big Fall Preview issue--you Young Dr. Kildare fans won't want to miss it!

Monday, August 22, 2016

Newsday TV Book, August 20-26, 1972.

The 1972 Olympics grace the cover of this week's Newsday TV Book. Spoiler alert: It doesn't go well. But that's not until next week, so we'll get into it then. By the way, this is the first issue without the price (ten cents) on the cover, so I guess that means it then came exclusively with the Sunday Newsday and was no longer available separately.
Displaying 8-20 (1) cover.jpg
The TV Line on the inside cover has all the info you need on Kopykat Marilyn Michaels, your various Robert Walkerses (and other showbiz relations), the demotion of the NBC Peacock, the lovely black Nichelle Nichols, and whether "Jodi Foster" will be back as Henrietta "Hank" Bennett (Don't squint--click on the pic!)                           
 Writer Erich Segal joined the ABC sportcasting team for the Olympics, given his status as an "amateur runner." His performance is probably most notable for the moment when a marathon imposter entered the stadium and Segal completely lost his shit.
This page detailing coverage of the Republican National Convention has some interesting tidbits, but my favorite part is the artwork--each network listing is accompanied by the actual graphics they used in their broadcasts from Miami Beach. ABC's Convention logo was pretty traditional, while CBS went hyper-groovy.
Here's some Gary Viskupic artwork for a rerun of Marcus Welby. Maybe I just don't get medical jargon, but isn't "minimal brain dysfunction" a good thing? I know it's what I strive for. In any case, the boy in Visk's drawing looks like Christine Ricci in Mermaids.
 Wednesday night's listings have some classic movies (and classic John Cashman reviews), one movie "to be advised" at 11:30, and, as dawn approached, an example of an Alan Ladd movie where he strips to the waist (to the unending fascination of Cashman).
For NBC's Friday White Paper special "Vietnam Hindsight," another Viskupic drawing.
Saturday morning Olympics coverage pre-empting Lidsville? Three-year-old me calls bullshit! (Okay, honestly I have no recollection of ever watching Lidsville. Which is a shame.)
Another striking Viskupic close-up shows Jesse Owens understandably running from a giant Hitler.
Aw fuck, last week we got our feet squeezed into brand-new Buster Browns for the looming school year, now Lobel's is looking to dud us up in slacks and jumpers and whatever the hell a "weskit" is!
Finally, last time out I gave you the crossword puzzle, so it's only fair that I offer the answers for anyone sufficiently deranged to have printed it out and taken a whack at it. As a bonus, here's the late-night listings (I want to go back in time just to shmeeze up and watch Head Shop at 1:30--looks like a 70's precursor to Night Flight), plus a miracle hair replacement that may or may not have involved a shiny toupee simply being drawn onto your head.
Same boring back cover three weeks running! Hey, County Federal Savings--we get it, compounded interest, now move along!

Wednesday, August 17, 2016

Newsday TV Book, August 13-19, 1972.

On this week's cover, Flip Wilson begins the controversial tradition of black comedians camping it up in drag. I can't think of anyone who did it earlier, anyway, and a cursory search turned up nothing, so I'm going with it. Feel free to enlighten me if I'm wrong.
A staffer from The Flip Wilson Show, Kathi Fearn Banks, offers this interesting article. The jivin' is over. (Remember to click on the pics to enlarge them.)
Carol Burton offers a little joke at her own expense when a reader asks to see her photo, but blows the gag by forgetting to add the captions. Otherwise, Long Islanders wonder about The Little Rascals, Don Grady and Cliff Arquette's health (answer: he'll last about two more years).
I bet "Mr. Jay" can learn to live with a microwave oven--he's probably got the munchies!
Friday night brings Orson Welles sharing an anecdote about Churchill with Dick Cavett, and Love American Style gives birth to Happy Days. Must-See TV, seventies-style.
Saturday night gives us an hour-long version of "The Seven Little Foys" on Comedy Theater, which I think originally aired in January 1964. Check out the Comedy Showcase at ten, aka pilots for shows that'll never take off, including one with Bill Fiore (trust me, you'd recognize him).
Back to school? Ah, crap! I guess we're heading to Lobel's for Buster Browns. Where I live now, kids are back in the classroom today, August 17th. In the 70's, if we had been forced back to St. Pius before Labor Day, I'm pretty sure we'da burned the joint down.
The back cover is a bore again, so here's the crossword puzzle instead. Good luck with the even-back-then-fairly-obscure TV actors and titles, though you'd better know that guy in the middle...

Sunday, August 07, 2016

Newsday TV Book, August 6-12, 1972.

On the cover of this week's TV Book (still only ten cents!), the Russian production of War and Peace is featured. Released in 1968, the six-hour epic ran on ABC over four nights.
Movie critic Joseph Gelmis gives W&P a rave, and artist Sudduth gives it a primitive drawing to go with the Friday night close-up.
The TV Line column: Long Islanders ask about the crap poetry of soap star Dick Shoberg, why Charlie Brown is such a putz, the marital status of Rashida Jones' mom, and somebody carrying something in a commercial. Carol Burton then sets the record straight on whale records, such as the one available at the Cold Spring Harbor Whaling Museum. (It was--and is--a LI maritime gallery which your very own Non-Parader visited in his youth, along with my dad and this guy, who, in the museum guest book section that asked where you learned of the museum, wrote "Bought a balloon." Now that's poetry.)
WCBS gives us a little bio of newsman Jim Jensen, a bit different from the one in the ad a few weeks ago...
The delightful Burgess Meredith graces Disney's Wonderful World, seeking the "Strange Monster of Strawberry Cove." I think it might be on his head.
On Thursday night, NBC presents Adventure Theater, which as far as I can tell is a repackaged 1964 episode of Bob Hope Presents the Chrysler Theatre called "Clash of Cymbals," starring Jack Klugman and the dynamite Laura Devon.
On Friday, Mike Douglas hosts hunky Jim Brolin, blast-phemous Rex Reed, tricky Sylvia Syms, activist priest Malcolm Boyd and organist/vacuum cleaner enthusiast Stan Kann.
Sorry, the County Federal Savings ad on the back cover is a real snooze this week, so that'll do it for this installment... Next week: Geraldine!

Newsday TV Book, July 30-August 5, 1972.

This week's 1972 Newsday TV Book brings us a cover featuring Lucie Arnaz, striking a seductive footboard pose (which appears to confuse her too).
Inquisitive Long Islanders wonder where the heck Melba Tolliver is, what that guy in that commercial ate, why we have to see so much of that fucking douchebag Nixon, and what this limey fella Roger Moore might be up to in the future. (Click the pic for better legibility...)
Back to Lucie--er, Desiree, simply.
Here's a somewhat prosaic Viskupic drawing (for him) and decidedly tepid Cashman review for ABC's Sunday Night Movie showing of Morituri.
Here's a look at all the cool movies you unemployed night owls could have caught later that night, with more great Cashman takes. (I threw in the wonderful world of Spa for the hell of it.)
Jumping ahead to Friday evening, we have a close-up on that night's Love, American Style, to the consternation of Sally Struthers.
Saturday morning brings a presentation of NBC's Children's Theatre, with the terrific Sid Caesar narrating "Pets Allowed."
On the back cover, the Colonial Shoppes offers the exact same living room set they offered two months earlier, except 66 bucks more expensive now. I TOLD you to get it then! (Actually, I think it's a slightly different arrangement. Does it really matter? I mean, biscuit tufted backs and hand-matched patchwork at just about any price is pretty darn sweet.)