Newsday TV Book, May 27-June 2, 1979.

Listen up, dummy! No, I'm not talking to Lamont Sanford--it's LeVar Burton on the cover, in a "controversial role as a deaf-mute."
(Yes, I know saying "Listen up dummy" is ridiculous as well as offensive. I'm playing a character here: the Loudmouth Long Island Dickhead! And I'm good at it because I play him in real life, too!)

Bill Kaufman talks with the director in this interesting cover story.

In the TV Line: Fallen Angel Kate Jackson, the shorter-than-I-thought Laraine Newman, and Norman Lear, quoting an anonymous Greek (probably not Jimmy).

ABC's top star needs more exposure, apparently, and the NBC Peacock makes a glittery return in this week's Off Camera, edited by Carol Burton Terry.

Sunday afternoon brought the Noseless Preggo showing off her pins, plus the Marx Brothers, Spanish Jewry, and... a planet where apes evolved from MEN?!?
On a Connecticut station so I CAN'T SEE IT?!?
Damn you, WTNH! Goddamn you all to HELL!!!

And just for the hell of it, this time out I'm showing every late-night schedule, starting with--duh--Sunday's, noteworthy (to me) for the Trilogy of Terror airing (and John Cashman's typically dry take).

Monday was Memorial Day, and the morning listings sat beside an ad with a lunchroom volunteer mom doing a Joe E. Ross impression in the name of shilling quality vinyl asbestos floor coverings. Or something.

That night brought a Gary Viskupic illustration in which he got to do what he did best: Nazis!

Late Monday/early Tuesday.

Late Tuesday's schedule, in which we find out Tracy is good but March was better, Bergman is marvelous, and Satan is passable.

I was ten during this week, and if I had been a little older, I probably would have stayed up to check out Dr. Orloff's Monster. Cashman's review may have been off-putting to others, but it intrigued me. I was that kind of kid. (Pretty sure I'd have been back to sleep in no time.)

I'm including Thursday morning just for the Bethpage State Park ad. Who the hell knew they held polo matches there?

Visk is at it again, with a portrait of the monstrous Dr. Mengele.

Classic Cashman for Nightmare Alley: "If you don't know what a geek is..."

Late Friday.

Now here's all day Saturday. In earlier versions, the Hollywood Inn Motel would frame their ad in X's. I guess someone decided that was a little on-the-nose.

The rare instance of a second story pops up at the end, with an AP piece taking an early look at Shogun.

The Cable TV Highlights are a little light on local programs--although I did find that disco dancer Ann Boccaccino (featured on Cablevision's Nobody Special) died about two-and-a-half years ago.

Here's some trivia (and awesome ads) for ya...

Some ads to help kick-start your pathetic social life: racquetball, disco, and video-dating!

Finally, yet another Suburban Colonial Shoppes ad on the back cover, this one a bit more chromatically subdued than usual. "Extra heavy, thick round, plump roll arms" and "over-all massive look" were phrases also employed by frequent TV Book advertiser Holiday Spa, but in a less positive way...

Stay tuned, fellow weirdos! Summer is coming! I don't like it!

Newsday TV Book, May 21-27, 1978.

Sorry, this isn't actually a full look at this week-before-Memorial-Day issue: I started to scan pages but got distracted, then decided to put just the Saturday pages in my Retro NYC Local TV Facebook group. So what the hell, I'll post the handful I got and hopefully someday I'll remember to add some more...

I posted the first two scans a year ago, but here they are again.
The cover has toothy James Coburn in The Dain Curse.

As I wrote last year, how dumb do you have to be to confuse two actresses with different last names and, yes, different faces, just because their first names are the same and they both have long blonde hair? I really hope S.C. of Seaford is never called upon to identify a criminal suspect in a death penalty trial. Or is eleven.

Here's a full-page ad for The Bastard.
The Bastard.
Tee-hee!

And now, the aforementioned Saturday listings.

A-right, that'll do it! Enjoy your Memorial Day, unless you prefer not to!

May the For-th Be with You!

 No, my damn lisp didn't come back--I'm posting a buncha random crap for Star Wars Day! That's May fourth, for the obvious reason (and if it's not obvious to you, you should probably just stop reading right now). I was infatuated with the original movie and sequel (as detailed in this blog post and its sequel), until a year or so before the third one came out in 1983. That's when I went cold turkey, just completely lost interest. It was almost three decades before I bothered watching Return of the Jedi with its cute/repulsive Ewoks (verdict: meh) and I haven't seen anything else from the franchise, except some of whichever TV show had "Baby Yoda." It had some amusing moments, but not enough to reclaim me. I have extremely fond memories of the days when SW captivated me, and recalling that feeling will do.

I recently returned to Long Island and visited a pop culture junk store. I browsed and brought a few things up to the counter, thinking they'd be a couple bucks, not realizing they were in fact made of solid gold (eye-roll emoji). The one thing I couldn't resist buying was a Burger King/Coca Cola The Empire Strikes Back Super Scene Collection stamp booklet, an oversized sticker album from 1980. I was a McDonald's fan and disliked BK, but I must have patronized it on several occasions: to obtain the SW/ESB glasses I still have in my collection, most acquired back in the day; and for one set of the stickers that were meant to be applied in that album. I don't think I ever had the album, so they went onto a box I had, storage for Magic Markers until it became an archive for letters from my friend (and fellow SW nut) Jeff, who moved to Charleston shortly after Catholic grade school ended in '83.

So I took the photos of these stickers and, because I'm a mental patient, digitally pasted them onto the photo of the album. The pages are too big to scan, so these are subpar phone pictures.

Front:

Back:

Inside:

Here's how they look on the box, which, yes, I still have.

And now, here's a bunch of other pics I have clogging up my computer and phone.
(These are not in the two posts linked above, but may have turned up on the Facebook group that accompanies this blog...)

Kenner Christmas rebate ad from 1979 TV Guide

1980 MPC model sweepstakes ad, from some Marvel comic

September 1982 Hills ad, from TV Guide. Note the movie’s original title, before it was decided that vengefulness was not very Jedi-like. I also enjoy that Darth appears to be poking the tip of his lightsaber between C3PO’s shoulder blades, and that Threepio looks kinda like Bender.

Frame from 1978 Two Guys TV commercial

Kmart 8mm film ad, from a November 1977 TV Guide

Another home movie ad (I forget where from but it's a British magazine)

More magazine and comic book ads

Now here's a slew of newspaper ads (movie and toys), probably not the best resolution because I screenshot most of them online.

Another from TV Guide...

...and the Star Wars Holiday Special close-up from the Newsday TV Book (11/17/78, duh).

Here's an ad for the short Hardware Wars being shown in nearby Hicksville, don't know the date...

...but here's the Newsday listing for when I actually saw it (August 19th, 1979), in the basement of my hometown's Plainview-Old Bethpage Library, before The Mouse That Roared. I loved them both!

I found this card in with a ton of trading cards my brother gave me when I visited. I think it's from a Wonder Bread set, but as you can see, not in great condition.

At that junk store I mentioned, I really wanted to buy this Chewbacca doll (which I had as a kiddie) but couldn't justify the price for an incomplete item. Sorry, dirty Chewie...

Here's a Polaroid of me on Christmas Eve 1980, with several toys visible.

Finally, my favorite: a letter to my older brother Charlie, after he had moved to Seattle. He sent me a "Han Solo Wanted Dead or Alive" poster, which I thought was about the coolest thing I had ever seen. It seemed he was able to find SW stuff I didn't know about, so I excitedly asked him, "Where the hell did you get [it]?" (I was about five months shy of ten years old, btw.) You can see that my mom changed "hell" to "heck," because apparently Charlie had never heard the word and she wanted to protect him, or maybe she thought that by editing it, I would then forget the mild curse word.

I was also way pumped about scoring a pair of Jawa figures, as well as some Mego Superheroes. I'm not sure where I picked up all the folksy colloquialisms, like 'em and ol', but I imagine Mad Magazine or Stan Lee played a role.

Keep an eye out, I may have more coming soon! Happy Life Day! (Wait, that's in November...)